Chapter 7 - THE FATHER WHO HAD BEEN ERASED
-7
Lumi turned nine before she asked to visit Jonah’s grave.
Maris had never taken her.
She said cemeteries confused young children.
Maybe.
But she had also removed almost every photograph of Jonah from 412 Birch.
Naomi believed deliberate.
I avoided assigning motive.
At nine, Lumi asked.
We drove to Columbus.
Naomi.
Lumi.
Me.
Not Maris, still incarcerated.
The cemetery sat under enormous maple trees.
Jonah Reed.
1988–2022.
Beloved Son, Brother, Father.
Lumi touched name.
“That’s my last name too?”
Her legal surname had been Bennett because Maris gave hers at birth despite Jonah paternity. So no.
“Reed is your dad’s.”
“Oh.”
She looked at Naomi.
“Why don’t I have?”
“Your mom chose Bennett.”
“Can I change?”
“When older, with legal process.”
Then she asked:
“Did Daddy Jonah know I loved him?”
Naomi cried.
“Yes.”
“How?”
“You told him constantly.”
“I don’t remember.”
“That doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.”
Important.
Then Naomi handed small envelope.
A photo.
Jonah holding toddler Lumi at aquarium.
Lumi laughed.
“He has weird hair.”
“Terrible.”
We laughed at grave.
Good.
Then she asked me:
“Are you jealous?”
I blinked.
“Of Jonah?”
“Yes.”
“No.”
Truth.
Maybe tiny insecurity but no.
“He was your father before I knew you.”
“Mom says you want replace.”
Maris letters still.
Even in prison, she slipped.
Her supervised correspondence reviewed, but statement perhaps during visit.
I said:
“I don’t need to replace anyone.”
“Then what are you?”
I thought.
“Gideon.”
She frowned.
“Boring.”
Then:
“Daddy Gideon.”
I smiled.
“Okay.”
No legal.
Then Maris’s parental status.
Prison alone does not terminate.
Naomi had guardianship.
Maris supervised video/visits.
She began therapy.
At first she blamed Celia.
Then less.
Her letters changed.
Lumi,
I used to tell you that your job was to help me keep our home. That was wrong. Housing was my responsibility.
Good.
Then:
I told you Gideon might leave if you spoke. That was wrong. His choices were his.
Good.
Then:
I told you Aunt Naomi wanted your money. I did not have evidence. I said it because I was afraid you would trust her.
Good.
Lumi read with therapist.
Sometimes replied.
Sometimes not.
At ten, she asked:
“Can Mom come home after prison?”
“To whose home?”
Good.
412 sold.
Naomi permanent guardian at that point? Court granted long-term guardianship while Maris rebuilding, review after release.
Maris would need housing and reunification.
Not automatic to me.
Lumi wanted Naomi home.
And me.
I lived in my own apartment near.
Could we form family? Naomi was aunt/guardian, I supportive adult. We became good friends, not romance. Important avoid pairing.
She joked:
“Please don’t marry me too. Family tree can’t take it.”
We laughed.
No.
Then Maris released after ~30 months with credits.
Lumi eleven.
She moved to transitional apartment.
Worked legitimate marketing job.
Restitution garnished.
No access trust.
Supervised visits.
First in person.
Maris walked in.
Lumi stared.
Then hugged.
This was not betrayal of me.
I told before:
“You are allowed to love your mom.”
She did.
Then Maris cried.
Lumi stiffened.
Therapist intervened:
“Maris, manage your emotion.”
She breathed.
Did.
Growth.
Then she told Lumi:
“I’m glad to see you.”
No apology dump.
Good.
Over time visits expanded.
Would custody return?
Court considered.
Maris had committed emotional exploitation but participated treatment.
At twelve, unsupervised day visits allowed, no overnights initially.
Naomi remained guardian.
Lumi wanted.
Maris respected.
Then one day Maris asked me to meet with mediator.
First time in years.
I agreed.
She looked different.
Not physically dramatically.
Less polished.
“Gideon.”
“Maris.”
“I owe you an apology.”
“You don’t need for my cooperation.”
“I know.”
Then:
“I used your profession against you.”
“Yes.”
“I taught Lumi to reinterpret ordinary care as threat.”
“Yes.”
“I filed a petition I knew exaggerated.”
“Yes.”
Then:
“I did not understand how much professional harm it could cause.”
I stared.
“You did.”
She looked.
“You wrote ‘ER nurse’ because plausible.”
She nodded.
“Yes.”
Correct.
Then:
“I knew.”
Good.
“Why?”
“Because the trust audit scared me.”
“Yes.”
Then:
“Did you love me?”
I had not planned ask.
She cried.
“Yes.”
I believed.
“Then why?”
She looked at hands.
“I was already stealing when I met you.”
Specific.
“I thought marrying someone stable might prove to trust I had built a safe home.”
So initially marriage partly instrumental.
“But I also loved you.”
Both.
“Then Harlow explained emergency housing clause.”
“She did not tell you fabricate.”
“No.”
“I saw way to postpone audit.”
There.
“And when Lumi started liking you?”
“I panicked.”
“Why?”
“She told you things.”
Not yet recorder.
But child trusted.
Maris feared loss of narrative.
“I was used to being only person who defined her world.”
That was deeper.
Then:
“You were becoming another adult she could compare my stories against.”
Exactly.
Control requires single source.
Then she said:
“I am sorry.”
I accepted as statement, not reconciliation.
“Thank you.”
Then:
“Will you ever forgive?”
“I don’t know.”
Fair.
Then she asked:
“Do you want to adopt her?”
My heart stopped.
“What?”
“If my rights are ever…”
“No.”
I interrupted.
“I’m not discussing taking your child from you.”
Good.
She cried.
“I thought.”
“Lumi can decide relationships. Legal decisions through court.”
I refused to become rival.
That mattered to Maris perhaps.
Then:
“Why are you still here?”
“Because Lumi asked me to be.”
Simple.
Then Maris said:
“Jonah would hate me.”
Not useful.
“Jonah is dead. Focus Lumi.”
May you like
She nodded.
Correct.
